My Magnum Opium... or Opus... Whatever...
- Thread starter danke
- Start date
I'm taking a month off from WickedFire, so by the time I return I hope that OP has delivered. If he doesn't deliver, I nominate ShadowCaster to write the Magnum Opus - but with pictures.
ShadowCaster, you have 100% free reign. As long as there is at least one penis, I'll be pleased and satisfied.
Danke sent me a PM, he's still printing to .PDF and working out how to set up a Paypal button then he's going to deliver.
HI, I’M GEORGE ZIMMER, FOUNDER AND (FORMER) CEO OF THE MEN’S WEARHOUSE.
I’D BEEN HEARING A LOT LATELY ABOUT THE MERITS OF THIS DANKE FELLOW, SO I THOUGHT I’D PAY HIM A VISIT- ZIMMER STYLE. AS I APPROACHED HIS HOUSE, I HEARD A TWIG SNAP BEHIND ME AND THEN OUT OF NOWHERE CAME THE LEG OF THE ONE AND ONLY DANKE. LUCKILY MY REFLEXES WERE TOO FAST FOR HIM. MY MASSIVE MASCULINE MEAT-PIPE BURST FORTH FROM MY FINELY-TAILORED TROUSERS, ENSNARING HIS LEG WITH THE POWER OF A THOUSAND ANACONDAS. HIS ONCE POWERFUL INSTRUMENT OF DEATH THUSLY DESTROYED, HE WAS COMPLETELY POWERLESS. I DECIDED THAT THAT UGLY MUG OF HIS WAS NOT UP TO ZIMMER STANDARDS, SO I DETERMINED TO DELIVER A MAKEOVER HE WOULDN’T SOON FORGET.
HE BEGAN TO CRY LIKE A KITTEN UNDER A STEAMROLLER AS MY PULSATING PELVIC PILEDRIVER DELIVERED BLOW AFTER BLOW TO HIS EVER-SOFTENING SKULL. AS I FINISHED OFF MY FLESH-SCULPTURE, I REALIZED THAT I HAD FORMED HIS HEAD INTO THE SHAPE OF DEVIL’S TOWER. THE SHOCK CAUSED ME TO LET FORTH A FLOOD OF CAUSTIC COD CREME THAT BURNED OFF THAT RIDICULOUS STUBBLE HE CALLS A BEARD.
HE’S UNCONCIOUS NOW, BUT HE’LL SOON WAKE UP. HE’S GONNA LIKE THE WAY HE LOOKS.
I GUARANTEE IT.
I’D BEEN HEARING A LOT LATELY ABOUT THE MERITS OF THIS DANKE FELLOW, SO I THOUGHT I’D PAY HIM A VISIT- ZIMMER STYLE. AS I APPROACHED HIS HOUSE, I HEARD A TWIG SNAP BEHIND ME AND THEN OUT OF NOWHERE CAME THE LEG OF THE ONE AND ONLY DANKE. LUCKILY MY REFLEXES WERE TOO FAST FOR HIM. MY MASSIVE MASCULINE MEAT-PIPE BURST FORTH FROM MY FINELY-TAILORED TROUSERS, ENSNARING HIS LEG WITH THE POWER OF A THOUSAND ANACONDAS. HIS ONCE POWERFUL INSTRUMENT OF DEATH THUSLY DESTROYED, HE WAS COMPLETELY POWERLESS. I DECIDED THAT THAT UGLY MUG OF HIS WAS NOT UP TO ZIMMER STANDARDS, SO I DETERMINED TO DELIVER A MAKEOVER HE WOULDN’T SOON FORGET.
HE BEGAN TO CRY LIKE A KITTEN UNDER A STEAMROLLER AS MY PULSATING PELVIC PILEDRIVER DELIVERED BLOW AFTER BLOW TO HIS EVER-SOFTENING SKULL. AS I FINISHED OFF MY FLESH-SCULPTURE, I REALIZED THAT I HAD FORMED HIS HEAD INTO THE SHAPE OF DEVIL’S TOWER. THE SHOCK CAUSED ME TO LET FORTH A FLOOD OF CAUSTIC COD CREME THAT BURNED OFF THAT RIDICULOUS STUBBLE HE CALLS A BEARD.
HE’S UNCONCIOUS NOW, BUT HE’LL SOON WAKE UP. HE’S GONNA LIKE THE WAY HE LOOKS.
I GUARANTEE IT.
Maybe after WF chose #2, OP realized he's never made 7 figures before.
Be patient guys. He's only 998,254 zip submits away from delivering.
Be patient guys. He's only 998,254 zip submits away from delivering.
OK, Mr Danke just contacted me. He paid me $10'000 to present the one and only Opium Opus gala. So here we go.
ARE YOU FUCKERS READY TO SEE THE ONE AND ONLY OPIUM OPUS POST????
ARE...
YOU...
READY???
ARE YOU FUCKERS READY TO SEE THE ONE AND ONLY OPIUM OPUS POST????
ARE...
YOU...
READY???
I think they are not ready yet, danke.
Let's try again.
When I say OCTOPUS you say MAGNUM OPIUM OPUS!!!
OCTOPUS!!!
Let's try again.
When I say OCTOPUS you say MAGNUM OPIUM OPUS!!!
OCTOPUS!!!