My 5,000th Post - Not What You Expected
- Thread starter eliquid
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Damn, JB.
I can't imagine what you're going through, but I seriously hope that your wife has taken the few days apart to cool down so that when you meet with her ya'll can have a rational conversation about the future.
I hope that she will be more receptive and open to letting you know what is on her mind, because it sounds like this is mainly her wanting to make a point about loss to snap you out of something that you weren't aware of before since this was a shock to you.
This will work out, I just hope she doesn't follow through with the divorce and gives ya'll another chance. It's not cool putting kids through breakups like that where it could have been prevented if both parents just said what the issue truly was and gave it a chance again.
I can't imagine what you're going through, but I seriously hope that your wife has taken the few days apart to cool down so that when you meet with her ya'll can have a rational conversation about the future.
I hope that she will be more receptive and open to letting you know what is on her mind, because it sounds like this is mainly her wanting to make a point about loss to snap you out of something that you weren't aware of before since this was a shock to you.
This will work out, I just hope she doesn't follow through with the divorce and gives ya'll another chance. It's not cool putting kids through breakups like that where it could have been prevented if both parents just said what the issue truly was and gave it a chance again.
Yesterday I noticed you where two posts away from 5k, so I periodically refreshed to see if anything came up. Valuable post....shitty situation.
As someone else said. Everything is temporary even pain.
If you can and want to work things out. If unable to communicate and try to reach a compromise without lawyers it makes things cheaper and easier.
As someone else said. Everything is temporary even pain.
If you can and want to work things out. If unable to communicate and try to reach a compromise without lawyers it makes things cheaper and easier.
All I'm saying is that it looks like he spent more time here accumulating 5k posts than spending time with his wife/kids. Sorry but for his 5,000th post.. this is exactly what I expected. Even while his marriage is falling apart, he finds the time to come here and use it as fodder for a 5k post. I think it's all bullshit anyway.
I'm never getting married.
Seriously, someone has to say it. The way your wife is holding you hostage by withdrawing access to your kids is disgusting and plain mean. Don't let your feelings for her cloud the fact that she is being a bitch. Take the gloves off and lawyer up. It shouldn't be that easy to take anyones family and walk away. Show her that you're not going to forfeit without a fight and she may reconsider what she's doing.
Seriously, someone has to say it. The way your wife is holding you hostage by withdrawing access to your kids is disgusting and plain mean. Don't let your feelings for her cloud the fact that she is being a bitch. Take the gloves off and lawyer up. It shouldn't be that easy to take anyones family and walk away. Show her that you're not going to forfeit without a fight and she may reconsider what she's doing.
The problem with your statement is now its too late. Look, I have a kid that is living with her mom. Instead of being a total douchebag we just talked like adults. The end result is that I have a really good friend now that is the mother of my child. Not only do I get to hang out with my kid when I want but I also have no issues hanging out with my ex. From what I have seen if lawyers get involved too much things get fucked between the adults.
Eli is a nice guy, I am assuming his wife is not a total bitch so maybe they will either
1. Get back together after they re-access their situation
2. Find a common ground that both of them will be happy.
Wow buddy, all I can say is at least you are in the position where you don't have to work that hard anymore. Maybe it just became a habit. Your wife should have been more communicative or honest with herself about her feelings (of being neglected/feeling you're distant if that's the issue) before she just plopped down the divorce papers...
Thanks for sharing and I hope you can get through the hardest part quickly...
Thanks for sharing and I hope you can get through the hardest part quickly...
So whats up you just going to give up? Your campaign is getting shitty results so you just going to cut your losses and move on? There is more to her leaving you than just work, have you admitted to yourself yet what that reason was? The real reason?
You need to get out ahead of this thing before a couple days move to a couple of months. Desperate times call for desperate measures. Going and begging is never going to work so you need to rethink the whole campaign and start from the ground up.
If you just give up and let this play out under her terms your fucked, and will live with regret the rest of your life. Its not to late, you have a very small window to figure this out. I strongly suggest you do some real soul searching and figure it the fuck out.
The first thing you need to do is to make sure you get to see your kids and make it as often as humanly (and track it) possible. BTW if you dont make this a priority not only will it minimize your chance of getting back together, she will more than likely hold it against you when it comes down to custody.
Wish you the best of luck. Just remember its not to late to fix your marriage and your life. Get your priorities in order and you can and will prevail.
You need to get out ahead of this thing before a couple days move to a couple of months. Desperate times call for desperate measures. Going and begging is never going to work so you need to rethink the whole campaign and start from the ground up.
If you just give up and let this play out under her terms your fucked, and will live with regret the rest of your life. Its not to late, you have a very small window to figure this out. I strongly suggest you do some real soul searching and figure it the fuck out.
The first thing you need to do is to make sure you get to see your kids and make it as often as humanly (and track it) possible. BTW if you dont make this a priority not only will it minimize your chance of getting back together, she will more than likely hold it against you when it comes down to custody.
Wish you the best of luck. Just remember its not to late to fix your marriage and your life. Get your priorities in order and you can and will prevail.
Not to be a dick, but did she ever give you any signs that she wasn't happy? Perhaps you ignored them or just didn't have your eyes open enough. Need to watch out for that, pay attention to the details. If you let her slip to the wayside, I hope that it's a lesson learned. If she is just trying to leave and get half your money, well fuck that bitch, fight her tooth and nail.
His account is 5 years old. That's 1k posts a year, or about 3 a day. It's not hard to accumulate that number considering a lot of his posts are like yours, trolling. He also has had a number of threads in the BST section, so yeah - he's on here anyway running part of his business.
All that aside, JB isn't the type of person who would troll about something like this, and really doesn't talk about his personal life on here. I highly doubt this is a bullshit thread.
JB, you got the digits. Reach out if you need someone to tell you to man up. Condolences, can't imagine the turmoil you're going through right now. So sorry to hear it. Hoping it's a phase and you guys work it out.
You're right it is disgusting and should be documented. If you live in a one party state record phone calls and keep a diary / journal documenting every time you request to see your kids. In the log write down when you were allowed to and when you weren't. It sounds like it's been going on a while so write as far back as you can truthfully remember.
One thing the courts hate is one parent keeping the kids from the other parent or using the kids to extort things out of one parent. They will shit on the person doing that so fast they won't know what happened.
Restricting access to his kids is serious bitch, psycopath behaviour. Consider that she is actually willing to harm his children to get back at him and then say she isn't a bitch? She is literally using her own children as a bargaining tool or even worse as a weapon to hurt him. It's inexcusable.
Stay strong. You got two kids to live for still.
People aren't what they used to be. Woman used to work with their hands on farms and barns to survive. Husbands never stopped working during those days. Its a shame divorce is so easy these days. You give them everything and its still not enough. Good luck finding greener grass on the other side, there's no perfect man.
I dont blame you for doing what you did. I feel the same way and work my ass off. But will take your advice.
People aren't what they used to be. Woman used to work with their hands on farms and barns to survive. Husbands never stopped working during those days. Its a shame divorce is so easy these days. You give them everything and its still not enough. Good luck finding greener grass on the other side, there's no perfect man.
I dont blame you for doing what you did. I feel the same way and work my ass off. But will take your advice.
hope op is doing well and I wish him the best.
there are two sides to every story so I think we should just avoid the name calling.
I would really be interested in hearing the full story from op, I have come close twice to divorcing with my wife and I tell you it gets pretty scary to think about what will happen financially to each party and also how the kids will handle it. we are going on 11yrs and are happy now.
stuff is complicated but it really does come down to two sides of the story.
I think the reason for my problems in my marriage come down to selfishness in that I make the money so I want to invest it in my business ventures, as long as theres a roof over our heads and food on the table I feel that I can spent my money any way that I want. My wife has a problem with that and that is what we had to learn to work out.
anyways I hope I can learn more from others and their situations. peace
there are two sides to every story so I think we should just avoid the name calling.
I would really be interested in hearing the full story from op, I have come close twice to divorcing with my wife and I tell you it gets pretty scary to think about what will happen financially to each party and also how the kids will handle it. we are going on 11yrs and are happy now.
stuff is complicated but it really does come down to two sides of the story.
I think the reason for my problems in my marriage come down to selfishness in that I make the money so I want to invest it in my business ventures, as long as theres a roof over our heads and food on the table I feel that I can spent my money any way that I want. My wife has a problem with that and that is what we had to learn to work out.
anyways I hope I can learn more from others and their situations. peace
Believe it or not, there is a decent ending to this. I've been divorced about 2 years, having joint custody and peaceful relationships. The every day after school thing rocks (WAHD FTW) and every other day of custody is perfect for keeping family and work separate. After the shock wears off it's not all bad.
If yours has already thrown around "divorce" as an option, you can't appeal to her emotionally anymore. Don't bother trying. It's now a business negotiation and you both have goals. Make it happen and move on (in a non shallow, cold-hearted way) because either way you're stuck exactly where you are.
If yours has already thrown around "divorce" as an option, you can't appeal to her emotionally anymore. Don't bother trying. It's now a business negotiation and you both have goals. Make it happen and move on (in a non shallow, cold-hearted way) because either way you're stuck exactly where you are.
Thanks for the emails, PMs, skypes, comments on here, etc.
Lets not forget the reason why I posted in the first place. Although I appreciate the comments and regards, the more important take away is I need YOU to help me on this 5k post.
Spend time with your loved ones, no matter how busy you are after reading this
This isn't a thread about divorce or my situation with my wife, but a thread about no matter how well you think things are going in life or how much success you have right now, tomorrow you could die in a plane crash, or your son could be ran over by a truck, your wife could fall and be put into a comma, INSERT ANY TRAGEDY WITH ANY LOVED ONE.
If you read this post and then did not tell a loved one how much you care or try to plan to spend some time with them this week based off my post, then I failed at my main goal and you just might find yourself where I am, filled with regret and wondering how I could have done better maybe.
It would be nice if some of you guys would check back on this thread and post that you actually did take my advice and did something special with your loved ones today, no matter how small.. I'll even start.
I finally got to see my kids today. I took them both out to eat and I listened to everything they had to tell me, even if it was about Justin Bieber and some little annoying girl at the pool that kept bothering them splashing water on them. They told me what they did the last 4 days and if I loved their mom.
Its hard to answer a question like this to 2 eight year old girls, so I decided to skip giving an answer right now. Since this late on Sunday nothing is open in my town, I took them to rent some movies of their choice and got some snacks and went home and am getting ready to watch the first one with them now.
Thanks again for the kind words, as far as posienembrace, I could care less what he thinks. I owe a lot of my success to WF because this was a learning resource for me when I started and is now a networking resource for me and my business. He is just butt hurt over the last thread me and he were in where he made himself look stupid.
Coming to WF is my replacement for watching the news or listening to the radio. Part of my business is here ( BST ), my learning was here, and my networking for future deals and partnerships took place here. This is about the extent of non business shit I do in my life for myself instead of listening to the radio or watching the news/reading the paper and is one of the reasons I even got the breaks I did in this business. I have no regrets about coming to WF, posting here, or catching up with people here. To think that the 30 minutes I spend here daily to sell my BST or to learn about FB/POF back in the day when I first started was the cause of my marriage troubles is about as stupid as it can get. If you read the paper/watch the news/listen to the radio... well, posting here and reading threads is my replacement for that "self time" that every human should get.
Lets not forget the reason why I posted in the first place. Although I appreciate the comments and regards, the more important take away is I need YOU to help me on this 5k post.
Spend time with your loved ones, no matter how busy you are after reading this
This isn't a thread about divorce or my situation with my wife, but a thread about no matter how well you think things are going in life or how much success you have right now, tomorrow you could die in a plane crash, or your son could be ran over by a truck, your wife could fall and be put into a comma, INSERT ANY TRAGEDY WITH ANY LOVED ONE.
If you read this post and then did not tell a loved one how much you care or try to plan to spend some time with them this week based off my post, then I failed at my main goal and you just might find yourself where I am, filled with regret and wondering how I could have done better maybe.
It would be nice if some of you guys would check back on this thread and post that you actually did take my advice and did something special with your loved ones today, no matter how small.. I'll even start.
I finally got to see my kids today. I took them both out to eat and I listened to everything they had to tell me, even if it was about Justin Bieber and some little annoying girl at the pool that kept bothering them splashing water on them. They told me what they did the last 4 days and if I loved their mom.
Its hard to answer a question like this to 2 eight year old girls, so I decided to skip giving an answer right now. Since this late on Sunday nothing is open in my town, I took them to rent some movies of their choice and got some snacks and went home and am getting ready to watch the first one with them now.
Thanks again for the kind words, as far as posienembrace, I could care less what he thinks. I owe a lot of my success to WF because this was a learning resource for me when I started and is now a networking resource for me and my business. He is just butt hurt over the last thread me and he were in where he made himself look stupid.
Coming to WF is my replacement for watching the news or listening to the radio. Part of my business is here ( BST ), my learning was here, and my networking for future deals and partnerships took place here. This is about the extent of non business shit I do in my life for myself instead of listening to the radio or watching the news/reading the paper and is one of the reasons I even got the breaks I did in this business. I have no regrets about coming to WF, posting here, or catching up with people here. To think that the 30 minutes I spend here daily to sell my BST or to learn about FB/POF back in the day when I first started was the cause of my marriage troubles is about as stupid as it can get. If you read the paper/watch the news/listen to the radio... well, posting here and reading threads is my replacement for that "self time" that every human should get.
Probably the mostly valuable guide someone has ever posted on here. It's not about marriage like you clowns all seem to think, it is about the illusion of safety and how we always thinks are static and that we have a right to something. We don't. Nothing is yours and nothing can be yours. Appreciate what you have right now cause you never know when it will "return".
