[advice]how to ask for oral sex...

If you are married " You beg"

Before marriage, They come crawling and suck you raw, in return, they want that nice diamond ring.
 


jstover77 said:
Mine starts out like this but ends a bit different.

Me: "Why the fuck should I give you anything? I'm the one who works everyday, pays all the bills, takes care of you, and everything else. What the fuck do you do?"

Her: "Yeah, but I take care of the fucking kids. Do you know how hard it is to take care of kids?"

Me: "Shiiiiiit....taking care of kids is easy. I wish I could take care of the kids all day."

Her: "OK well that is good because I need to get my hair and nails done. If you want a blow job you will watch the kids when I go. Oh, and I need $200."

Me: "What the fuck do they do for $200? Do I get naked pictures of your hot hair dresser with that too? Fucking Christ.."

Her: "Don't argue with me...do you want a blow job."

Me: "OK sure no problem."


Sometimes it is a much easier process.


Her: "I need $200."

Me: "I need a blow job and take the kids to your mothers on Sunday so I can watch football without screaming kids."

Her: "Deal."

Me: "OK that means a blow job right now."
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thats you'r whore with kids?
 
jstover77 said:
Mine starts out like this but ends a bit different.

Me: "Why the fuck should I give you anything? I'm the one who works everyday, pays all the bills, takes care of you, and everything else. What the fuck do you do?"

Her: "Yeah, but I take care of the fucking kids. Do you know how hard it is to take care of kids?"

Me: "Shiiiiiit....taking care of kids is easy. I wish I could take care of the kids all day."

Her: "OK well that is good because I need to get my hair and nails done. If you want a blow job you will watch the kids when I go. Oh, and I need $200."

Me: "What the fuck do they do for $200? Do I get naked pictures of your hot hair dresser with that too? Fucking Christ.."

Her: "Don't argue with me...do you want a blow job."

Me: "OK sure no problem."


Sometimes it is a much easier process.


Her: "I need $200."

Me: "I need a blow job and take the kids to your mothers on Sunday so I can watch football without screaming kids."

Her: "Deal."

Me: "OK that means a blow job right now."
Click to expand...


So you're paying $200 per BJ to a woman that said at the alter that they'd give you free BJs for the rest of your lives???
 
jstover77 said:
I am assuming some of you guys aren't married. It's doesn't matter if you are married or not. You are paying for it in one way or another.
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Yeah, but from that exchange, you're paying for it one way AND another.

EDIT - this is why I would never let my wife not work. I've never understood the whole 'paying for another person' thing, with the exception of your kids until they're old enough to earn it (about 5 in my book. My daughter is three and has already been shown how to use a goddamn dustpan and brush). You want to spend $200 on your hair? Good for you. I'll tell you it looks nice afterwards, but you're not spending my $200.
 
jstover77 said:
I am assuming some of you guys aren't married. It's doesn't matter if you are married or not. You are paying for it in one way or another.
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yeah but you're giving us great reasons NOT to get married cause your ROI is terrible! You might as well get a hooker as someone else pointed out unless your wife is some super magical cook
 
amateursurgeon said:
EDIT - this is why I would never let my wife not work. I've never understood the whole 'paying for another person' thing, with the exception of your kids until they're old enough to earn it (about 5 in my book. My daughter is three and has already been shown how to use a goddamn dustpan and brush). You want to spend $200 on your hair? Good for you. I'll tell you it looks nice afterwards, but you're not spending my $200.
Click to expand...

Most of my statements were tongue and cheek. In all seriousness, my wife used to work, but once we had kids it didn't make much sense financially anymore for her to continue. Daycare is completely outrageous, and it was cheaper for her to stay at home.

It is true that she spends $200 to get her hair done every few months, but it is one of the only things she ever does for herself. Every other time she needs money it is something for the kids. So, the wife and I actually have a great relationship, and although my 4 year old hasn't learned to use the dust brush yet, she knows she has to clean up after she makes a mess.

Remember, everyone's situations are different. I think it is great for her to be able to be with the kids all the time. The only downside some would say is that I have to give her money when she needs it. Small sacrifice to me in the end.
 
chigga102 said:
So you're paying $200 per BJ to a woman that said at the alter that they'd give you free BJs for the rest of your lives???
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Actaully, you got duped

A woman uses her sexuality to get you married, after marriage (the end game for female childhood), it's the threat of putting their sex back on the open market that is their main currency ... hence all the healthy open relationships and failed, lie ridden closed ones.

Men are better suited genetically for monogamy ... although it's unnatural for both sexes. I know that sounds fucked up when we've got thoughts about planting seeds all over the earth, but fuck a hole in the wall or your hand ... it works and will keep you satisfied indefinitely.

Whereas women have a craving for foreign (read: not familiar) semen during certain cycles of menstruation (vasoline and a q-tip works on other animals). It's genetic and comes from the fact that it takes the average guy 2 minutes and the average female 30 minutes to get off .. do those numbers add up to you? Do you think they just go unsatisfied? Do you?

Wake up guys. Stop living in fantasy land .. it's fucking evolution, you can't fight it but you can contain it by not getting duped into marriage.
 
erect said:
Actaully, you got duped
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29zy5vd.jpg
 
erect said:
Men are better suited genetically for monogamy ... although it's unnatural for both sexes. I know that sounds fucked up when we've got thoughts about planting seeds all over the earth, but fuck a hole in the wall or your hand ... it works and will keep you satisfied indefinitely.

Whereas women have a craving for foreign (read: not familiar) semen during certain cycles of menstruation (vasoline and a q-tip works on other animals). It's genetic and comes from the fact that it takes the average guy 2 minutes and the average female 30 minutes to get off .. do those numbers add up to you? Do you think they just go unsatisfied? Do you?

Wake up guys. Stop living in fantasy land .. it's fucking evolution, you can't fight it but you can contain it by not getting duped into marriage.
Click to expand...


Say what? I'm genetically better suited to sleep with the same person for the rest of my life? Can you please substantiate this.

And also, this whole "you're paying for it one way or another" mentality...can someone explain that to me? Or is that just a collective rationalization you guys have for settling for a less-than-ideal relationship?
 
erect said:
Whereas women have a craving for foreign (read: not familiar) semen during certain cycles of menstruation (vasoline and a q-tip works on other animals). It's genetic and comes from the fact that it takes the average guy 2 minutes and the average female 30 minutes to get off .. do those numbers add up to you? Do you think they just go unsatisfied? Do you?
Click to expand...

I read that and heard this: "I want her to go down on me, but don't want to go down on her."

If you don't want her out looking for other men and yet still want her to go out of her way for you sexually, then spend some time and get her off properly.
 
Just whip out your dick and give her this look

JohnBoltonAngryLook.jpg


Don't say anything. Just wait and stare. Works 60% of the time, all the time.
 
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