True Players Got These

I am referring to the 'Flushable' wipes... it's nothing more than clever branding. Did you actually read the reviews as I suggested. Here, look for yourself: Amazon.com: Cottonelle Fresh Flushable Wipes, Refills Case of 4/84s (336 ct): Health & Personal Care

As I do not have "adorable 70+ year old cast iron pipes" I am not too worried.

Plus how many people go online to rate toilet paper unless they specifically cause a problem? I'm sure I can find 6 people who used "Insert Toilet Paper Company" who had plumbing problems and 'swear' it was because of the toilet paper.
 


How exactly does a bidet clean your ass?

Does it use high pressure and blast away the poop on your ass? If this is what it does, how do you know all the poop is gone?

Or do you use it in combination with your hand or something?
Yeah, for a proper bidet, you use it in combination with your hand, for something like in the OP, though, it's basically like a jetwash, but for your arse.
 
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I've used a bidet before and it was an oddly pleasant experience. You wouldn't immediately think it would clean like toilet paper, but it does. It's like a gentle cock that massages your hole without penetrating. Highly recommended. A++