Solve this disagreement between the wife and I, who's right?
- Thread starter JMan1234
- Start date
Sounds like your wife and I have a lot in common, although I'm as WASPy as it gets. Fortunately, I know myself well enough to just clear out when I'm in a bitchy mood or let me husband know ahead of time to he can head upstairs to play WoW and let me stew for a bit. Ah, marriage.
Read that in a book somewhere? Quiet desperation, my ass. I read once that men who are married live longer, more satisfied lives. What is it these guys are so quietly desperate to do?
UPDATE: Had a talk with the wife tonight...told her I thought it was absolutely unfair to try and keep me from seeing my brother on his birthday, especially when it was just for 3hrs. Told her to think about the situation reversed, and how she would feel if it were her sister's birthday.
She's going to ask her Grandparents if it would disrupt anything if I left for a few hours. But either way, I'm going. She'll either be mad at me, or she won't....but I'm going.
She's going to ask her Grandparents if it would disrupt anything if I left for a few hours. But either way, I'm going. She'll either be mad at me, or she won't....but I'm going.
Like the OP, they are “desperate” to act autonomously but are limited by wives that micromanage their lives. It isn’t something I’ve read. I witness it constantly.
Not every married man has a blank stare and constantly seeks approval from “the boss” but good portion do. Often these same men are nagged or even verbally castrated by their wives in public. Their plight is hardly hidden behind closed doors.
I notice because I care about my fellow man. A connection is there.
Women have laundry lists of complaints about their partner or objections of their own towards marriage. Shitty movies like “Eat Pray Love” prove that women often feel just as trapped as some men. I leave it to other women to relate to their plight. I can only see the world through the lenses of a man and except this limitation.
Married individuals may very well live longer and be more satisfied. Too bad when you marry there is a 50% chance of divorce. I’m willing to wager a single man is smidgen happier than a divorcee living in a 1976 Gremlin down by the river due to child support and alimony payments. I never was much of a gambler.
I normally wouldn't point out grammar errors, but....
You're wrong, the grammatically correct phrase is "the wife and I". "Me and the wife" is conversational, like "might of" instead of "might have" for example.
Its a prepositional phrase. Me is correct. I should only be used when its the subject.
She'd better be a fucking 11 out of 10 in looks to have to put up with this shit for 11 goddamn years. Jeezus H.
And ya amateursurgeon's plan would work. Just be prepared for a shitkicking either before or after the reunion, coz you know it's comin bro....but it'll be worth it
And ya amateursurgeon's plan would work. Just be prepared for a shitkicking either before or after the reunion, coz you know it's comin bro....but it'll be worth it
Alright, I'll give you that point. Well spoken sir, I've seen a lot of bad marriages, too. I have seen a ton of great ones as well, and it's a shame you haven't seen more of those at least.
An interesting side note - I recent DID read that the divorce statistics are actually skewing a bit. Something like 70 percent of couples married for the first time are still married. And divorces in general are down across the US, probably due to the recession and the need for dual income/support/cost of actual divorce. Apparently it's the Baby Boomers with multiple marriages and divorces who are messing up the stats for just about everyone else - divorces have been decreasing for years. Will be an interesting trend to follow over the next decade.
WTF..
I agree with internetauthor as watching the single guys pipe up is quite amusing.
and as a happily married man (yes, there is such a thing) it boggles my mind to read some of the things you guys put up with.
STOP.PLAYING.GAMES.
Just that. No emotional manipulations, trickery, etc.. from either party.
I don't put up with it, nor does my wife.
Just honest, open communication will get most trouble out of the way.
A thing like this would not even be a question, unless there would be some kind of special event at exactly that time during the family reunion. (Which there is not, as the OP stated, his wife does not even know what will be on during those hours)
I get the feeling that one or both sides are hiding - emotions, reasons behind this, etc..
All of this does not even add up to "man the fuck up" but rather to "get your relationship straight".
Be adults. Talk about it. Telepathy does NOT work.
::emp::
I agree with internetauthor as watching the single guys pipe up is quite amusing.
and as a happily married man (yes, there is such a thing) it boggles my mind to read some of the things you guys put up with.
STOP.PLAYING.GAMES.
Just that. No emotional manipulations, trickery, etc.. from either party.
I don't put up with it, nor does my wife.
Just honest, open communication will get most trouble out of the way.
A thing like this would not even be a question, unless there would be some kind of special event at exactly that time during the family reunion. (Which there is not, as the OP stated, his wife does not even know what will be on during those hours)
I get the feeling that one or both sides are hiding - emotions, reasons behind this, etc..
All of this does not even add up to "man the fuck up" but rather to "get your relationship straight".
Be adults. Talk about it. Telepathy does NOT work.
::emp::
f her. it's 3 hours. cry a river and paddle your way back to the boxing match. wtf.
if it's a family reunion, they won't even notice you're missing because they'll be so busy with all the rest of the family.
they will pay attention to you for about 2 hours, tops, over the course of the weekend. that's 70hours of boredom, minus the hours you're sleeping, drunk and don't remember, she's yelling at you for nothing, plus the hours you pet a dog because you're bored, and plus 4 for the amount of hours you'll binge drink and eat.
there's still room for boxing.
her family will respect you for visiting your birthday brother for a few hours. if not, then they're all as nutty as she is.
go! go! go!
or....invite him and watch the boxing at the reunion!
if it's a family reunion, they won't even notice you're missing because they'll be so busy with all the rest of the family.
they will pay attention to you for about 2 hours, tops, over the course of the weekend. that's 70hours of boredom, minus the hours you're sleeping, drunk and don't remember, she's yelling at you for nothing, plus the hours you pet a dog because you're bored, and plus 4 for the amount of hours you'll binge drink and eat.
there's still room for boxing.
her family will respect you for visiting your birthday brother for a few hours. if not, then they're all as nutty as she is.
go! go! go!
or....invite him and watch the boxing at the reunion!
been with the missus for 6 years now, (not married) and the silent treatment works wonders. make sure you leave the room though.
Silent treatment, and logic always wins in this situation. Silent treatment will give her time to weigh 3 hours vs 72 hours.
If she still doesn't agree, its time you pack up.
Damn make up your mind, sounds like your whipped!
Silent treatment, and logic always wins in this situation. Silent treatment will give her time to weigh 3 hours vs 72 hours.
If she still doesn't agree, its time you pack up.
Damn make up your mind, sounds like your whipped!
Silent treatment is completely mental (in the psychological sense, not "headcase" sense) - if the silent treatment works you have a good shot of "telling it how it is" as well. The entire concept behind silent treatment is that they care that they did something wrong, something so bad that you're not talking to them.
Silent treatment within a situation where the individual thinks they're in control (and correct) won't really do anything as their decision is right and you should carry on.
So flip the situation, make the decision, take the hit for a week and respect for a year while' shoutin' out...
</2cents>
Me is used when you can replace the phrase with "us"
I is used when you can replace the phrase with "we"
us --> me
we --> I