Anxiety Ridden—Do Not Want

I don't know what I could say to add to the kindly paternalism of barman, but I will say that money stress is a self-inflicted disease. Virtually any sort of problem that you're having in life that can be fixed with money is not a real problem. It's just that simple.

If you're worried about paying your bills, get a job. Don't say "I can't work and go to college and do this IM thing!" Get a fucking job. Making your mark online and getting a degree in English are lifestyle choices; eating and having a roof over your head are not. If you have to sacrifice something, I recommend against sacrificing food. Get a job, finish your degree, spend as much time as humanly possible fucking and getting high like a normal nineteen-year-old, and in your spare time learn how to make some extra money online.

At your age -- and I honestly don't mean this in a condescending way; I am being 100% realistic and straightforward -- at your age, you have no concept of what pulling in an extra few hundred bucks a month does to your ball size and your outlook. When you and all your other friends get out in the real world and find that paying bills sucks like a motherfucker, you have an ace up your sleeve in the form of knowledge about alternate ways to bring in the money. Pay your bills, keep your debt under control and do the IM thing on the side until you know what you're doing with it, and then do it full time for a while, and then when the money is actually rolling in regularly, live the lifestyle that you imagine everybody on this board with more than 500 posts is living.


Frank
/would kill every single one of you for a chance to be nineteen again and know what I know now
 
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I'm a year older than you and I was in a similar situation last semester, so maybe I can help you out.

HUST1N said:
How can I continue to pay for rent when my parents promised me they'll go halfsies on ea. month's rent (minus utilities) and they haven't followed through on that promise? Blah, blah, blah.

I don't know why I get this way, but I do. And it's like, when I'm not stressing about money, I'm stressing about being successful. I will kill myself if I end up like my parents. They're in their late 50s and won't be seeing retirement probably until they die. I just can't fathom being a parent myself one day and having my kids stress themselves sick 'cause they're worried or hesitant to approach me for $ to help them tie up the loose ends when their student loans fall short of paying for their essentials.
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You need to stop relying on your parents.

You aren't entitled to anything from your parents and you shouldn't think you are.

That's a big problem with our generation. We think our parents are supposed to buy us our first car, to pay for our college, and to give us money whenever we need it.

That's bullshit.

Last year, I built up a lot of anger towards my dad because he could have helped me out monetarily in certain situations and didn't.

But then I realized that if I wanted to go to college, if I wanted to live at my own place, and if I wanted to be successful, then I had to earn it through straight up hustlin'.

HUST1N said:
But, when I'm stressing the fuck out over paying rent, it's hard for me to devote quality time into my projects and into learning news things. So, I'm stuck. Help.
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Last semester, I was barely able to pay rent.. month after month. I ate nothing but ramen noodles and oatmeal for weeks on end. Occasionally, I was able to splurge on a pizza.

For 4-5 months, I earned all my rent money and all my food money on my own. It sucked, but it humbled me.

That experience changed my life, for the better. I hustled hard for months and now I am reaping the rewards.

Now, I don't have to worry about rent or food or being successful.

Heads up though: Unless you are some sort of God that requires no sleep, you won't be able to be successful in School, Work, and Social Situations. Pick 2.

Last Semester I chose School and Work. It sucked not being able to party, but it was worth it.

Now I Work and Party.


Make this your theme song:

[ame="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wxQk1Q9_u1Q"]YouTube - Broadcast Yourself.[/ame]
 
Meditate every day. You are just young, overwhelmed and lost. It is normal. Life experiences make you stronger. Just plough through it.
 
Not sure how motivating this will be, but I try to keep personal shit off this forum for the most part. Anyway, feel lucky...

I'm a UA grad (class of 2005, Eller College). In 2003 I was living in a 4 bedroom house on 2nd Ave (222 2nd Ave, check it out sometime, it's still a shithole) with 2 other dudes. Total rent at the place was $400 a month, and we still struggled between 3 of us to pay for rent & electric. My parents had declared bankruptcy a year before and couldn't help with student loans, but they were still employed and sent a couple hundred every month.

I had just been told by an advisor that there was no way I could get into the Eller program with my current grades, and she had suggested that I go to community college for a year before applying.

So, needless to say, that was a pretty low point for me. Drinking/smoking on the alley-couch we had in our house made me feel better, but at the end of the day I was still poor, born from poor people, and with few prospects.

I'm not saying what I did would work for you, but this is how I got out of it:
1. Started lifting weights and running again. Exercise is the single most important thing you can do for yourself. Don't even think about it as "losing weight" or "gaining muscle" because then you're just stressing yourself out with more goals. Get up and do it. The gym at UA is sick, all the equipment is last year's athletic dept stuff (thank you Pepsi!), and I think it cost $5 a semester to be a member when I lived there.

2. Got a job supervising one of the computer labs. All you do is refill staplers and turn off the computers at the end of the night. I got paid $8 an hour to do my homework, and not doing it was the reason I had shitty grades in the first place.

3. Got a second job with a real estate company in Tucson. This eventually became my first full-time job out of college, but places are always looking for kids who know the web/email to help them out for $12 an hour. The work was boring, but it eventually turned into a full-time job with bonuses. This also turned out to be a shady place that got shut down by the AZ AG, but not until after I left.

4. Busted my ass and aced my entrance exams and interviews to get into the Eller college (always wanted to go back and put my balls on that advisor's desk, but I didn't).

5. Started hanging around people who were in the mindset of being successful (i.e. not my roommates). Eventually, these folks turn into the mediocre MBA's of the world, but in college they provide a really great way to stay motivated. I let them handle the busy work for group projects while I came up with the really killer stuff: project ideas, spreadsheet calculators, well-designed flash and PPT templates for presentations.

Eventually, I was earning enough money to move out to a place on Tanque Verde with my GF at the time. By the time I graduated my teams had won all the major case competitions, I had a 3.4, and was accepted into the limited-enrollment portfolio management course at Eller. I was working about 30 hours a week at the real estate office, and they were paying me bonuses on every house sold.

There's a lot more to the story, but it's 5 years later and I'm self-employed, house, 2 cars, motorcycle, girlfriend, dog... blah blah blah.

The good news is that no one expects you to not fuckup when you're 19 (or cripes, even when you're 28). And whatever you do, you have a very long time to fix it. I'm not saying that's a license to go set fire to a building, but it is a license to try out different things, or do some strange jobs.

Go get involved in anything positive. If you want to PM me your major and stuff I can probably help suggest some things to do and places to check out. Don't stress about wasting time. If current trends are to be believed, you could very well live to be 90. It took me 5 years to turn things around, and I'll probably have to do it again at some point. There's no point worrying about making a "wrong move". As long as you're moving you're doing more than the next 10 people.

And just as an aside: My girlfriend is from Iowa and a big Hawkeyes fan. I slept on the couch last weekend, but it was sooo worth it :D
 
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Do you think leaders of fortune 500 companies lead stressfree lives without problems?

For more awsome lifeadvice, pm me.
 
mindmade said:
My friend just got out of bootcamp for the Marines. Yesterday he told me one thing that stuck with him was whenever anyone started bitching the drill instructors would say "No one fucking cares". Waaah I'm too tired/stressed/scared. No one fucking cares. Just get shit done.
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This is my mentality exactly. You won't catch me bitching about anything, because I learned a long time ago that no body gives a shit and complaining akes no difference. I don't bitch and I sure as fuck don't want to hear other people bitching. Suck it up and figure your shit out already....best thing anyone can say to you. Ok, you're stressed, so you have two options, fix it, or sit around dwelling on it making it worse. Which one are you going to choose?
 
Give your parents a little credit. What do you think it cost them to bring your ass up for 18 years? Couldn't have been completely dysfunctional - you have college ambitions and they're still together. Suck it up. The best steel goes through the fire.
 
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