Knock, Knock. Who's There?

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rockhard

rockhard

Less Is More
Apr 24, 2008
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Jehovah's Witnesses. Those fuckers (2 ladies in their 70's) knocked on my door 5 minutes ago, when I opened the door it took me about 1 second to recognize them, so I said "You can go to hell" and slammed the door before they had said a word about their bullshit religion. Rockhard 1 - Jehovah's 0.
Feel free to share your own story about retards knocking on your door unannounced trying to promote some crap.
 


i love screwing around with the people that sell you crap you dont need...its better on the phone though...they call, ask you how you are and I go into a very therapeutic 20min convo about how stressful work has been and my dog just isnt learning how to sit very quickly and make up some stuff about my health being bad. then i say "phew that was great, thanks for the talk...*click* when people knock on my door i open it very slowly (keep the chain on) and peer at them through the crack...dont say a word...just keep staring...in about 30seconds they get creeped out and walk away....otherwise i stare and then squirt them in the face with a water bottle...im a jerk i know
 
My wifes grandmother is a Jehovah's Witness, Fucking weirdo's.
She's never pushed it on me though. That would piss me off.
 
I use Seinfeld's joke all the time when they call me:
phone: Hello sir, would you be interested in.....
me: I don't have time for this right now. Can you give me your home phone number and i will call you at 5am?

:DYeah MF's
This makes me happy all the time. You should hear all the answers.
 
They just recently stopped by my house too, 2 came to my door yesterday saying

"People are destroying the earth with pollution and global warming, but don't worry God won't let humans destroy the earth!"

Me - "then why are you on my doorstep?"
 
I used to know a JW who was hot as hell. I went out with her a few times. Shit that could be be me going door to door but I have some restraint. Not much though.
 
I saw 2 brainwashed JW riding bikes ... WITH HELMETS on today.

I thought there were dorks :)
 
I like answering the door with ketchup all over my hands and looking around nervously.

"Could you come back in about an hour? I'm right in the middle of...something."

They never come back.
 
amanda11 said:
I saw 2 brainwashed JW riding bikes ... WITH HELMETS on today.

I thought there were dorks :)
Click to expand...

Not Jdubs, most likely Mormans.

I grew up in the religion (JWs), got a family full of em. Left around 18 yrs old after figuring out that it ain't for me.

Funny to hear your stories lol I never got to encounter folks like you guys.
 
SEOlson203 said:
i love screwing around with the people that sell you crap you dont need...its better on the phone though...they call, ask you how you are and I go into a very therapeutic 20min convo about how stressful work has been and my dog just isnt learning how to sit very quickly and make up some stuff about my health being bad. then i say "phew that was great, thanks for the talk...*click* when people knock on my door i open it very slowly (keep the chain on) and peer at them through the crack...dont say a word...just keep staring...in about 30seconds they get creeped out and walk away....otherwise i stare and then squirt them in the face with a water bottle...im a jerk i know
Click to expand...

LMAO. Gotta try that next time someone comes knocking. I'm gonna drool too while looking at them.
 
The last time I got JW's using their door-to-door salesman approach to religion on me, I decided to be a complete ass (usually I just close the door on them).

There were 3 of them - all women. I let them start talking for like 20 seconds and even pretended to flip through this little pamphlet they gave me. Then I interrupted them and and said "Excuse me, but as you can see from this sticker on my door I don't allow solicitations. Especially not when what you are trying to sell if a cult membership. Now, there is a street right there in front of my house. Go wait until a car drives up, then step out right into the middle of the street."

Then I slammed the door on them.

But seriously, afterward I spent like 5 minutes watching around outside to make sure they didn't come back to break out my windows or burn down my house or soemthing.
 
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