(Note: its long but it does lead to point)
Last night, I was about to go to bed after drinking a bottle of wine. But first... I get an Instant Message:
Profsite: Hello
trigatch4: hi
Profsite: How are you
trigatch4: Good... you?
Profsite: Fine
Profsite: Excited with great SEO results
trigatch4: nice
trigatch4: Have we talked before? Sorry my AIM list is too damn long..
Profsite: ee it
trigatch4: ee it?
Profsite: hang on let me send you
Profsite: Have a look on some of lates results
At this point he sends me an incoherent excel sheet marked Nov. 2007 that shows one of his websites ranking in the top 20 for useless keywords:
Profsite: Mate i want to let you know our latest SEO RESULTS
Profsite: We have promoted lots of websites
Profsite: like myspace, travel, articles etc..
trigatch4: whats your point?
Profsite: We provides complete web solutions and Promotions
trigatch4: I think it is you who should be buying my web solutions and promotions
Profsite: so you are seo as well/
trigatch4: Yes. And English is my first language. Where did you get my screen name if I may ask?
Profsite: Didn't remember
trigatch4: Do you remember now?
Profsite: no
trigatch4: Interesting. So how did you assume I might want SEO services?
trigatch4: You randomly typed in my screen name and it happened to be real and you asked about SEO services and I just happened to be a web developer?
trigatch4: I'm just curious...
Profsite: bye
trigatch4: Where are you going?
Profsite: seems you are not interested
At this point I decide that I AAMMMMMM interested... but mostly to just amuse myself. So, I try to suck him in by sounding interested:
trigatch4: if you have very cheap, promotional link building services than you could possibly, maybe interest me
Profsite: We provides quality promotions and link building services
Profsite: relvant links
trigatch4: how many? where? and how cheap?
trigatch4: what types?
trigatch4: for example I can already get 1,000 directory submissions for about $75
Profsite: Mate we does
Profsite: keywords optimizations
Profsite: make site on 4-6 keywords on top 10 of GOOGLE
trigatch4: I don't sites and I don't need "keywords optimizations"
Profsite: Okay what you needs then
trigatch4: link building... what link building can you do
Profsite: We provides one way link building
trigatch4: Okay... for how much?
trigatch4: For one site I want to promote, I have a budget of $5,000. What can you offer me for $5,000?
Profsite: We can provide you complete SEO for that
Profsite: Hang on
trigatch4: Which includes what?
trigatch4: I want specifics
Profsite: Sure
Profsite: Hang on
trigatch4: Please provides me with alls the specifics you haves
Profsite: Sure
trigatch4: I will be right back... phone call
Profsite: Okay
Profsite: i am sending you doc
He sends me a document of his "SEO Process" which is basically just a bulleted noob list of things like "directory submissions", "one way links", "keyword research", etc... and I go in for the kill:
trigatch4: While I am gone please explains why theres are no prices, no amounts of links I will get for my moneys and no details. Only ideas and no specifics. Please make more details more tell.
Profsite: Sure
Profsite: Hang on
trigatch4: bees rights back
Profsite: Reliable Webdevelopment, Web Design, Seo & Ecommerce Solution
Profsite: Check here
Profsite: It show much more idea what will you be get
trigatch4: excuse me I meant $5,000 in your money... indian rupees which is $125 in United States Dollars. Discounted for inflationary monetary measures calculated by the Federal Bureau of Internet Fiscal Policy Control Measures that would be $2.83/month. Can you offer the Titanium Package for that amounts?
Profsite: Are you crazy
trigatch4: Crazy about what?
Profsite: mate it's cost you 600$ per month
trigatch4: Okay fine. I will sell you the Titanium Package for $500 per month. Final offer. Than you can re-sell it to your clients for $600 per month and make $200 per month.
trigatch4: $100 per month rather, sorry.
Profsite: No
trigatch4: I will also throw in a press release distributed in PRweb.com for free!
Profsite: no
Profsite: you can take 300$ per month package
trigatch4: Hmmmmm. Interesting offer.
Profsite: ?
trigatch4: Okay I will make you an offer you can't refuse.
Profsite: ?
Profsite: what's that
trigatch4: I will use you if you can match the offer from blah blah
After a VERY long pause...
Profsite: what is this
trigatch4: internet nirvana
trigatch4: can you do this?
Profsite: Means?
trigatch4: RICK ROLLLLLLLLLLLLLED
And that is the reason I didn't go to bed until 3 in the morning. Terrible use of time... but so terribly entertaining!
:anon.sml:
Last night, I was about to go to bed after drinking a bottle of wine. But first... I get an Instant Message:
Profsite: Hello
trigatch4: hi
Profsite: How are you
trigatch4: Good... you?
Profsite: Fine
Profsite: Excited with great SEO results
trigatch4: nice
trigatch4: Have we talked before? Sorry my AIM list is too damn long..
Profsite: ee it
trigatch4: ee it?
Profsite: hang on let me send you
Profsite: Have a look on some of lates results
At this point he sends me an incoherent excel sheet marked Nov. 2007 that shows one of his websites ranking in the top 20 for useless keywords:
Profsite: Mate i want to let you know our latest SEO RESULTS
Profsite: We have promoted lots of websites
Profsite: like myspace, travel, articles etc..
trigatch4: whats your point?
Profsite: We provides complete web solutions and Promotions
trigatch4: I think it is you who should be buying my web solutions and promotions
Profsite: so you are seo as well/
trigatch4: Yes. And English is my first language. Where did you get my screen name if I may ask?
Profsite: Didn't remember
trigatch4: Do you remember now?
Profsite: no
trigatch4: Interesting. So how did you assume I might want SEO services?
trigatch4: You randomly typed in my screen name and it happened to be real and you asked about SEO services and I just happened to be a web developer?
trigatch4: I'm just curious...
Profsite: bye
trigatch4: Where are you going?
Profsite: seems you are not interested
At this point I decide that I AAMMMMMM interested... but mostly to just amuse myself. So, I try to suck him in by sounding interested:
trigatch4: if you have very cheap, promotional link building services than you could possibly, maybe interest me
Profsite: We provides quality promotions and link building services
Profsite: relvant links
trigatch4: how many? where? and how cheap?
trigatch4: what types?
trigatch4: for example I can already get 1,000 directory submissions for about $75
Profsite: Mate we does
Profsite: keywords optimizations
Profsite: make site on 4-6 keywords on top 10 of GOOGLE
trigatch4: I don't sites and I don't need "keywords optimizations"
Profsite: Okay what you needs then
trigatch4: link building... what link building can you do
Profsite: We provides one way link building
trigatch4: Okay... for how much?
trigatch4: For one site I want to promote, I have a budget of $5,000. What can you offer me for $5,000?
Profsite: We can provide you complete SEO for that
Profsite: Hang on
trigatch4: Which includes what?
trigatch4: I want specifics
Profsite: Sure
Profsite: Hang on
trigatch4: Please provides me with alls the specifics you haves
Profsite: Sure
trigatch4: I will be right back... phone call
Profsite: Okay
Profsite: i am sending you doc
He sends me a document of his "SEO Process" which is basically just a bulleted noob list of things like "directory submissions", "one way links", "keyword research", etc... and I go in for the kill:
trigatch4: While I am gone please explains why theres are no prices, no amounts of links I will get for my moneys and no details. Only ideas and no specifics. Please make more details more tell.
Profsite: Sure
Profsite: Hang on
trigatch4: bees rights back
Profsite: Reliable Webdevelopment, Web Design, Seo & Ecommerce Solution
Profsite: Check here
Profsite: It show much more idea what will you be get
trigatch4: excuse me I meant $5,000 in your money... indian rupees which is $125 in United States Dollars. Discounted for inflationary monetary measures calculated by the Federal Bureau of Internet Fiscal Policy Control Measures that would be $2.83/month. Can you offer the Titanium Package for that amounts?
Profsite: Are you crazy
trigatch4: Crazy about what?
Profsite: mate it's cost you 600$ per month
trigatch4: Okay fine. I will sell you the Titanium Package for $500 per month. Final offer. Than you can re-sell it to your clients for $600 per month and make $200 per month.
trigatch4: $100 per month rather, sorry.
Profsite: No
trigatch4: I will also throw in a press release distributed in PRweb.com for free!
Profsite: no
Profsite: you can take 300$ per month package
trigatch4: Hmmmmm. Interesting offer.
Profsite: ?
trigatch4: Okay I will make you an offer you can't refuse.
Profsite: ?
Profsite: what's that
trigatch4: I will use you if you can match the offer from blah blah
After a VERY long pause...
Profsite: what is this
trigatch4: internet nirvana
trigatch4: can you do this?
Profsite: Means?
trigatch4: RICK ROLLLLLLLLLLLLLED
And that is the reason I didn't go to bed until 3 in the morning. Terrible use of time... but so terribly entertaining!
:anon.sml:
