I used to have a friend on WickedFire but we fell out. You remember, it was the time I got fingered by Chris Mars, and Hayley Evers reckons she saw Joe Wylans taking a dump in the sea. I said, if you like, fancy me, why don't you just say so? God, it was exactly like the time Miss Rennig, who everyone knows is a total lesbian, made Candice Burton stay behind after PE, started telling her off for gobbing on Sunita Geschwani's hair. But everyone knows she only made her stay late because she wanted to get off with her, cuz when she was telling her off her legs were wide open and Candice reckons she could see her spider. Anyway, you know Micha? Well, she saw the whole thing, right, because she was bunking off school because she was gonna go down the wimbley and get off with Luke Griffiths, only she never because he's been trying to grow a moustache but it just looks like pubes, so she got off with Luke Torbet instead, only don't tell Bethany that because she's fancied Luke Torbet ever since she flashed her fanny at him during Home Economics. But don't listen to her coz everyone knows her vag goes sideways - she's got her own council flat and three kids and she's only nine!
So much for being BFF.